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" Now it is I who is offended. In what way are you belittling my manhood?" I demanded.She took some exception to my lack of body hair, lack of six-pack (pronounced stomach muscles) and insufficient body tan. My "junk" was barely adequate, but otherwise I was close to perfect. "On second thoughts, your lack of hair down there gives you a certain childlike innocence that I do find rather cute. Aren't you afraid some sleepless cop might find you a little astray from legal requirements?" I could now see her face quite clearly. She appeared to be fortyish, rather plain, dressed in some kind of tracksuit with a constant and appealing smile. We continued to exchange banter for a few minutes, during which time I lost the degree of vigilance I normally have when out and about without clothes. At some stage she raised her gaze above my face, and whispered, "We have company."I turned to see a middle-aged couple, standing at the adjacent intersection, clearly studying the naked wayfarer, and his. ’ It didn’t end with the teachers, I was on the very shallow end of the popularity pool, but I was by no means a target for the school bullies. Martial arts, a daily jogging regimen, and a few high school sports per year kept me in a good physical condition. The slightest hint of a physical confrontation was easily thwarted by my truthful assertion to my would-be attacker that I knew more ways to kill him than he knew how to die. I graduated with honors from my suburban high school, but it left me feeling emptier than ever. My girlfriend left me to pursue a career in the arts, but that didn’t faze me one bit. She acted like being with me was holding her back from something, when, in truth, it was she that ignored, and even tried to shatter, my hopes, dreams, and wants. Truth be told, I was happy to be out and deathly sick of her drama. In my search to fill the void in my life, I turned to work. I got a promotion to shift manager at the local burger joint, and quickly became a.
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