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Tom took the tube as he did every Saturday from his home into town to get his weekly shop. His friend Matt jumped on two stations down. “Hey Tom, you got any spare tickets for tonight?” he joked. “No mate, if I had you could have one with pleasure.” “Okay, cheers anyway. They’re like rocking horse shit. I spent six hours last month, refreshing the browser, but nothing.” “Ah that’s tough Matt. You left it a bit late though.” “I know. Oh well TV it is then!” “I’ve not seen you for a few weeks. You’ve not been down the gym?” “I know Tom, torn a tricep!” Matt rubbed his upper arm, indicating the healing muscle. “Ouch!” “By the way,” asked Matt. “How was your trip to Europe… where was it?” “Slovakia. Yes good thank you. Caught a salmon! This big!” Tom held his hands out, exaggerating his catch by fifty percent. “Wow! Well done!” “Thanks. How‘s what‘s her name? Becky wasn‘t it!” asked Tom, casually. “Ah, moved on Tom. Seeing a girl from the hairdressers now.” Matt made a blowing gesture. We play all kinds of songs, but mainly classics where we changed the text slightly into a version that each of us feels is the song should have been to begin with. (Like, for example, did you notice how the 70s Eurovision Winner “Save your kisses for me” can be sung really well as “Celia pisses on me”? Anyway, that’s the kind of thing we do.)So, this particular story (or part of it, it’s already getting so long that I might have to break it down into several episodes) is when Taz and Nadia got married, and since gay weddings were (and are) not possible in our country, they had the wild idea to go to the US for that. On top of it they wanted us all of course to be bridesmaids, so all five of us girls embarked on a wild adventure overseas. Their plan was to fly to San Francisco, which had at the time just legalized gay marriage, have a bachelorette party, get wed, have a good time, and come back home as a happy family.The craziness already started at the airport. We had each taken 2.
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