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“Let this feeling of shame and remorse completely capture you. Do not resist it, but rather relax and surrender to your experiences. So it is necessary now.” She had whispered me it in the ear in strange reteam; again and again. I had moaned in answer and cry until the wave of vomiting spasms squeezed my body.Now look at me and at your father. We are calm, full happy, and we enjoy with all the opportunity of life. My daughter was happy at night, we saw it. And now she is full of shame and regrets that she was happy. This is stupid. Let's turn your shamefulness into pleasure. I am with you now. Repeat after me; ‘I am ashamed and I enjoy it! I love to be ashamed!’“I can’t!” Karl, do you remember how many young girls and boys went through our bed? How many pristine boys we have seduced, how many girls have shed their virgin blood here on our sheets? Some were just amazingly behaving and I will never forget those nights. When they left this room, were they ashamed of their behavior or. But knowing your ‘Gods’ as I do, I am certain that their purpose is not the purpose they told you. Their purpose in empowering you is not altruistic. Their purpose is not to benefit you or humanity. I half-suspect their purpose is to put up a front that helps ensure their survival. I half-suspect that their purpose is to flush me out, to get me to expose myself, perhaps to destroy me, although they truly have no idea who or what I am.“Moreover, dear Cynthia, you are being taught lessons, but not by your ‘gods’. The being giving you these lessons is much much older than your ‘gods’. Or at least older than their presence on planet Earth. My lessons are designed to mold you into an image that I desire, for my purpose, not yours. And certainly not for your benefit. I will turn you into my obedient slave, both in your dreams and in real life. And in the process, I will turn you from their tool into my tool. My tool to use against them. But that, Cynthia dear, is a labor for another day..
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