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It brought to mind a cartoon that showed a satyr chasing a nymph and bore the caption ‘It’s just one fucking thing after another.’ He sighed. ‘Well, there’s nothing I can do about it now.’ The sound of his voice was loud in the empty house. ‘Yah!!’ He shouted into the silence. ‘Yah ARGHH!!!’ The wordless bellow died and he felt a little better. ‘More scotch,’ he staggered to the sideboard to clutch the bottle like a lifeline. He pondered this image. ‘I am drowning’ he thought then aloud, ‘drowning my sorrows’. This, too, he found ironic. He didn’t usually drink. It was his wife – more accurately now his ex-wife – who liked to have her evening ‘relaxer’. ‘Anything you can do, I can do better’ His voice was cracked and harsh, redolent with pain. So he started to laugh but it sounded to him like sobbing. Time passed. The shaft of sunlight falling into the room moved slowly to one side then disappeared. The streetlights came on and still he sat, sometimes mumbling but mostly silent. In. I’d be far enough forward to give her room to work and she’d just paint while I was playing. The focus would still be on me and my guitar, but she would be a dancer painting behind me. I chose a program of Segovia pieces and just lost myself in playing, paying no more attention to the monitor than I did when a girlfriend was curled up next to me.When I was finished with the thirty-five minutes of music, I turned and saw Joan was still painting, swaying as if she were dancing to the music that still rang in her ears. I was caught in her simple beauty and started playing again. What I was seeing was not sexy clothes or carefully applied makeup. I was seeing a woman caught up in something she loved, drawing me into her circle.I didn’t face the camera to play, I played facing Joan, often just improvising rather than playing from my list. This was more akin to playing face-to-face with Cindy than to having a girlfriend sitting beside me. I could tell we responded to each other and both.
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