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Tommy couldn’t take his eyes off his cousin’s undulating bottom as she walked toward the door. Just before she went out, Kim turned and gave him a smile that shook him to his socks. ‘Does she know I watched her last night?’ he wondered, his mind spinning. ‘God! If she does…’ ‘What do you have to do in North Hamden, Tommy?’ Aunt Karen asked again. ‘Earth to Tommy…’ ‘Huh?’ Tommy, befuddled, looked at his aunt. ‘Ah, there’s…there’s a man over there I have to see about joining a health club,’ he stammered. It was sort of a lie, but he didn’t want anyone to know about his karate training. Aunt Karen looked surprised. ‘A health club…’ she said softly. ‘I guess I never thought about you as the health club type.’ She patted her full hips. ‘I suppose I should think about joining one, shouldn’t I?’ ‘Ah…I-I think you’re pretty, Aunt Karen,’ Tommy choked. ‘You…you don’t need to go to a health club as far as…as I-I’m concerned.’ It wasn’t a lie. He thought she was very pretty and he’d seen a lot. Call her and tell her.Q: What is white at the top and black at the bottom?A: Society!Q: Have you heard the one about the lesbian that took Viagra?A: She couldn’t get her tongue back in her mouth for a month!Q: What do you call a virgin on a water bed?A: A cherry float.Q: What do a near sighted gynaecologist and a puppy have in common?A: A wet nose.Q: What does a homeless woman use for a vibrator?A: Two flies in a bottle.Q: What’s the job application to Hooters?A: They just give you a bra and say: “Here, fill this out.”Q: Why don’t blind people skydive?A: It scares their dogs!Q: What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?A: It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.Q: What do you call a Chinese midget?A: Tai NeeQ: What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?A: Slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.Q: Why do they call it the wonder bra?A: When you take it off you wonder where they went went.Q: Why did God create orgasms?A: So women can moan.
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