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Our parents always said we would be together, which would just embarrass us both! We were convinced we were just friends, after all we had a brother/sister-like relationship. You could guarantee wherever Joseph was I would be too, and vice versa. During the summer break we would spend everyday together, out walking, bike rides, picking apples from the trees... they were sweet times. Who's life isn't sweet when you're 16?! Neither of us had ever been in a relationship - we spent too much time together to fall for someone! We had just left school in 2001 and the summer break was here and college would soon be around the corner. One Tuesday morning Joseph called me & asked if I wanted to go for a walk. As always I agreed and before I knew it we were walking through a poppy field 3 miles from home. The sun was shining, there were no sounds other than the birds singing and our young innocent laughs. "Did you know poppies are red because they're angry?!" Joseph joked. "You're so stupid!" I. The beauty, the order, of the plants were stabilizing. The new growth gave me hope my life could again be filled with beauty.As I lugged the tools from my storeroom, I thought of Barbara. As I carried the sacks of mulch from the car, my eyes teared. Barbara would have been appalled by those tears. She was probably sitting on the white cloud hovering over me, watching as I leaned on the handle of my spade in disconsolation. I could see her head gently shaking back and forth in a silent 'tsk tsk'."Jack," she would say, a hand lifting my chin to make me look at her. "Life goes on. You need to live each day to the fullest, to relish its beauty and uniqueness. No pity parties. No gloomy Guses. Come on, Jack. Get on with your living."Yes, Barbara would say that. She faced more than one loss with grace and serenity I envied. Barbara would be right. It had been seventeen months since she died. It was time to stop grieving and get on with living.Saying it is a lot easier than doing it. I had.
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