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.. I don't know," I said finally, truthfully. "I wouldn't choose, or I'd choose neither," I shrugged. "If that's the wrong answer, I'm sorry." I looked at their faces and settled on Julia's. "It's the truth. I choose not to choose."Julia stared into my eyes as if trying to gauge my sincerity, but Sylvia was nodding as if she'd already known what my answer would be. Christine whispered something to Wendy, and the woman nodded her head. And I just sat there, waiting for judgment of one kind or another."I believe you," Julia said finally, and she smiled warmly into my face. "And so will the others."I had the immediate sense that I'd passed some small test, but I didn't know how or why. It had seemed to me that of my possible choices, the one I'd made had been the least correct. I'd wanted desperately to take the side of God, and who wouldn't? But I hadn't felt His presence within me. I'd never felt it. If I were truly on His side, wouldn't I have known it already? But I'd killed, only. The sun was getting low in thewestern sky and was casting long shadows on the beach."Did you say you did martial arts?" he said."Yeah. Tae Kwon Do. For at least 4 or so years." That's cool. How did you get into that?" Well," I said, sitting down in the sand facing the ocean. He sat downnext to me. "I was bullied during my pre-teens. There was this oneincident. I was in front of my house. I was maybe 11 or 12 or something.Some boy who was friends some some other kid the the street bullied me. Iremember that being the final straw. My dad decided to enroll me in selfdefence classes. I started taking Tae Kwon Do after that." What happened? What did he do to you? Unless you don't feel comfortableto say?" It's been a while. And I don't really remember the details."I thought about it, trying to retrieve the memory. I closed my eyes. "SoI was out on the front of my house doing yard work. I think I was weedwhacking border of our lawn."* *Being the oldest it was my responsibility to do the.
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