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" And she drifted out of the mausoleum.I stood there gaping. How had she known my room number? I recollected myself and followed after her, but she was gone. I looked around wildly, and thought I saw a dark figure bending over a gravestone some distance away. I ran to the spot, but the figure was not she. Instead it was Sophia from the restaurant. A gentle humming noise, or maybe color, radiated from her. It calmed my spirit."Sophia," I cried. "Have you seen," I started to ask, then thought better of it. "Have you seen the sexton?" I finally managed."We have no sexton anymore," she told me. "The city mows the graveyard, and the real estate agent keeps track of the plots. What are you looking for?" My ancestors," I told her."The real estate agent would know," she said."Is this a relative of yours?" I asked, indicating the grave she was standing by."My mother and father. And next to them is my sister. Beyond these are my mother's parents. My whole family is here, all but me," she said. He tried to speak, but his teeth were chattering so hard no words would come out. The green creature had a smile on its face. He just knew he was about to be eaten by this awful thing.He finally uttered, "You are the Grinch. What do you want with me?"The creature said, "I am not the Grinch. I am the Grunge. The Grinch is my brother and a miserable sick bastard."Kurt, dribbling on himself, said, "The Grunge? What the hell is a Grunge? I thought that grunge was some sort of music genre made up in the Seattle area."The Grunge told him, "It is, but they stole that name from me. I am the Grunge."Kurt asked, "Let me get this straight you are the Grinch's brother, and you hide in my closet in a cloud of smoke?"The Grunge replied, "No, stupid, I am the Grinch's sister. Are you blind? No wonder you are a virgin."She pulled down her red fur-lined shirt, exposing her bright green breasts and olive-colored nipples.Kurt's comforter started rising and formed a tent as he looked at the Grunge's.
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