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Three hillbillies were sitting on the porch. The first hillbilly said “My wife is so dumb, yesterday she dragged home a brand new washer and dryer, and we ain’t even got electricity!” The second hillbilly said “My wife is stupider than yers, yesterday she brings home a new dishwasher, and we ain’t even got runnin’ water!” The third hillbilly said “My wife is even stupider! Yesterday I was in the kitchen and I saw her purse on the table. Everything was spilled out of it and there was a bunch of rubbers layin’ there ... and she ain’t even got a dick!”At a wedding party recently someone yelled “All the married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living”. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.I heard a story about a guy who got a call from his doctor the day after a visit. From what I gathered, the doctor says “I hate to tell you this, but I have bad news and worse news”. Dude asks what the bad news is, doctor goes “you have 24 hours to live”. Dude. She had sultry eyes, she dressed sexily in short skirts or tight jeans and tops and her thick, silky, wavy black hair was like a shampoo commercial as it cascaded down her shoulders.I used to sit next to her at government press conferences on Wednesday afternoons. This was in Tobago, where I lived for a year or so and managed to get a job as the Tobago correspondent for one of big brother Trinidad’s national papers.I sat next to her at these things because we were two of only three journalists prepared to sit in the front row; the rest preferred to skulk at the back, out of harm’s way if the week’s featured politician decided to ask questions of his or her own.The other one of the three was Indy, a stick-thin but pretty Tobago Indian who was married and quite prim and proper. She and Aster had been friends since they started in the profession. So, although I was always first to arrive and Indy second, I would leave a chair between us for Aster, who would sashay in a bit later, but.
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