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It’s important to my health.This One Is Compliments of Charm_BHere’s one I found funny:All mushrooms are edible, but some only once.These Are Compliments of John ASome are dated but are still funny...1. My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds. Only 15 to go.2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was a pizza. I ate a pizza.3. How to prepare Tofu:a. Throw it in the trashb. Grill some meat4. I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.5. I don’t mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food in 3 hours and 20 minutes.6. A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.7. Kids today don’t know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.8. Senility has been a smooth transition for me.9. Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero. "Kevin, Bob wasn't 'ogling' Gail. Although she does look pretty good in that suit," I said as I glanced toward their room where the lady in question was sprawled across the bed, out like a light. Wrong comment at the wrong time. When I got off the floor my jaw felt like I'd been hit by a truck."Kevin! What was that for?" Beth had walked into the room just in time to see my brother deck me."I just don't like the way guys are looking at Gail. Dammit, it's bad enough when strangers do it, but to have my own brother almost drooling over her!"Beth's snicker had Kev wheeling on her. "I mean it! She didn't do anything!"Bath laughed. "Kev, are you really that naïve? Why do you think she wears that bikini? Grow up!" Yeah, but she's my girlfriend. Why would she want other guys to look at her?"Beth threw me a look along the lines of, 'He's your brother, haven't you taught him anything?'"Kev, she's a girl," I said. "A good looking one. Why wouldn't she enjoy guys drooling when they look at her.
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