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I cleaned the chutes and ladders as I liked to call the 'I fooled you by drinking coffee and eating donuts system'. That was simply a matter of drinking a glass of baking soda, with a drop of vinegar, mixture. Fortunately it passed over my taste receptor quickly. When I followed it with a large glass of pure water, I would be able to forget all about the taste for at least a month.I let that mixture hang around inside the storage are for a half hour. Then I sat on the toilet, opened all the valves, and drank a half gallon of distilled water. That's the stuff my mom used to run through her steam iron.When that was finished, I reset all the valves and switches before I poured myself a shot glass of extra virgin olive oil. I was back on the toilet when I opened the release valve for the olive oil storage container. When it was empty I closed the valve and quickly drank the glass of fresh oil. I figured I was good for another four thousand miles. I know that is silly, but it was my sad. Reaching out from the bed, she lifted the receiver and dragged the headset back under the sheets where she had buried her throbbing head only six hours before."Hello?" the forty-seven-year-old brunette said in a groggy voice."Good morning, Mrs. Madison, this is your ten-thirty wake up call," said the disgustingly cheerful voice on the other end."Wonderful," she replied, already replacing the phone on its cradle before she could say what was really on her mind to the desk clerk.Only five minutes later, Joyce admitted defeat and tossed aside the sheet, lifting herself up and swinging her legs over the side of the bed. The room around her came in focus as she put on the eyeglasses she had left next to the phone. The cold spartan nature of the hotel room didn't help her mood."Damn that miserable bastard!" Joyce cried out as she recalled the reason for her sour mood.Yesterday had been a day that should've been one of the happiest of her life - the day her son took a wife. And for the most.
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