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Not too sure if it was from me or the T-Rex! Immediate thoughts came to mind of a rather gooey, pungent and lumpy fluid running down my legs that had been hastily and uncontrollably emitted from my rectal orifice with the sphincter gland well exceeding its human anatomical parameters! …. Although undoubtedly imminent, fortunately this did not occur. In retrospect, looking down the barrel of 10 tons of terrifying tormented tyranny brandishing two ‘Samurai Swords’ deeply embedded in its lower jaw, this was not for the faint-hearted. Happily conceding that he had won the battle, the blundering bulk of buoyancy arrogantly turned and nonchalantly retreated to the water as though nothing had ever happened, well bully for him! Never was I more pleased to come down from that tree after a good 30 minutes had passed and that I had convinced myself that it was acceptably safe to collect my tackle and depart immediately with a promise NEVER to return to that place of foreboding fear! After. Longhorns are easily spooked and can stampede on ya if not careful.”“Of course,” Paul nodded in understanding.“So where is the best place to be?” Jacob asked eagerly. “What’s the best job out here?”“Oh that’s easy,” Frankie crossed his arms. “Riding up front, leading the herd is where you want to be. Lot cleaner and simpler up there, but none of y’all are going to get that post.”“Why not?”“Cause fucking Buck, our Mad Cowboy, always gives that sweet job to his brother Jimmy the dickhead.”Frankie laughed but the others didn’t.Fact is, Frankie’s one nasty son of a bitch, but he’s not totally lying here. It’s true that I always put Jimmy up front but it’s for good reason and I don’t give a shit what Frankie thinks of that. My brother has a great nose for direction and keeps the cattle moving at just the right pace. To me, that’s invaluable.“So, if upfront is the best spot,” Jacob reasoned. “Then where’s the worst place?”“Oh,” Frankie kicked a stone while thinking it over. “Riding in back.
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