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"You look weird," Andy whispered tilting his head to the side, like aconfused dog."How weird?" Like a girl."Before I could respond to that disquieting comment a ripple shot throughmy skin, starting at my toes and quickly through my body. I don't knoweverything that ripple did to my body but when it reached my chest therewas an explosion, One second I had a normal flat chest and then BAM!Instant breasts! Andy's eyes grew wider than I had ever seen, so I toolooked at what had happened. Large fleshly orbs now sat high on my chest.Round, perky, proud. I was now the owner of a pair of breasts. Not justany breasts but the type of breasts that made women jealous and mencrumble. I now could get men to do whatever I wanted and all it wouldtake would be a hint of cleavage or a slight press of them against theirchest. I didn't and couldn't comprehend the power of my breasts rightaway because I was more surprised by their arrival. I looked at Andy and he stared right back. I stood up and ever so. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit.Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.9) Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away.Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.10) Retrieve cat from neighbour's.
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