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Torn between my desires and my heart. And I couldn't believe my own mouth as a timid, quiet voice spoke. "I want to stay as your slave, Mistress... "She hugged me close and dried my tears, soothing me. "There, there, that's a good girl. I knew you would. This isn't going to be as bad as you fear. I love you. Just trust me... you hear me? Trust me. This is the first real test of your submission to me, and I want you to pass it with flying colors. You have to get it into your head that you are a possession now. My possession. Something to be used as I see fit on my terms. This isn't a game anymore."I heard her, but everything felt like it was happening to someone else. This couldn't be real, this couldn't be happening. "Yes Mistress."After she was gone, I tried to bury my feelings carrying out the orders she left me. I cleaned the house spotless, practically attacking the kitchen floor with a mop in my frustrations. I tried making myself believe that this was all a trick-that she. It was something I would be able to take care of all by myself and I'd always wanted to be in a smaller house anyway. The only reason we kept that 'monster' was so all the kids would have a place to visit whenever they stopped by, and they always did. If any of the parents wanted to know where their kids were, they only had to call Eleanor to find out.During all those years together both of us had a healthy sex life. Once a week, like clock-work, we went to bed and 'explored' each other. Eleanor didn't want to call it 'having sex', so we used 'explored' instead. Seemed to give it a better flair if you ask me. Made it seem important to both of us, and in a way it did. 'Exploring' with Eleanor was always a thrill, and we never got tired of each other. It was only in the two years before her death that our 'exploring' stopped completely. She wasn't able to do many things and she tired very easily those days. Towards the end she couldn't even get out of bed and it was up to me to take.
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