I double pressed the rewind button and took the opportunity to make my tea. While I was adding milk the tape's whirl clunked to a stop and then I heard the machine begin playing. There was some cheesy music, not his style at all, and some muffled dialogue. I couldn't make it out.I walked back from the kitchen to a scene, seemingly across half the wall, of a crowd of naked men around a single woman on her back. I didn't initially recognize what I was looking at. The symmetry made me think I was looking at a flower. The men wore erections and were all masturbating. I had never seen even one man doing that, never mind a crowd. Weren't men supposed to be shy of each others' dicks? Their hands were moving to fast for me to make out details.The woman could have been anyone's sister or neighbour. She was biggish and had the jolly self-knowing look of a lot of big girls. Even alone I was embarrassed. I lifted the cup to my face, sipped, realised I was as naked as the people on the screen. I. I'm sorry once again for lying to you on the phone about being at the Claiborne's, but I was just so desperate to try to contain all of this craziness that had entered my life. Please, can you ever forgive me?"I looked at her and stroked her cheek with a finger of my left hand. "Sweetie, I can forgive you and I do; but I can tell you that it is going to take quite a while for me to get over the disappointment I'm experiencing because you did not trust me with the truth. That is the kind of thing that eats away at my own trust of you as well. And trust is one of the foundations of marriage."I felt a twinge of conscience as I said all of this, since I had not told Claire all about my business dealings with Sonny and the boys. But, this was not an appropriate time or venue to come clean about that. I would definitely plan to tell her later. But, until that time, I had a role to play."In all of this, it looks like you did not trust me enough to tell me; and, by your lying and sneaking.
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