I had lucked out and picked up this tiny furnished single room apartment because the old lady who had lived there before me had had a bit too much to drink and then taken a swan dive off the cliffs behind the building. Not that the cliffs were that high, but it was high tide and there were rocks and it was dark and no one gave a shit about the old biddy any way. The neighbors only noticed she was gone when she didn't show up for her canasta game. I think they were more pissed because it was her turn to bring the nibbles than they were that she was dead. Apparently, she wasn't that good a card player, but she always brought good things to nibble on when it was her turn. Don't you just love California? Got their priorities damn straight, damn it!Anyway, as I was passing by the building, the paramedics were loading what was left of the old lady into the county meat wagon to take to the morgue. The ambulance couldn't make it into the small parking lot of the apartment complex — it was. I handed it back to him. "Get used to it. Maybe you'll like it."Jean-Luc came in. "How's my best girl?" he asked me."Ready to get down and dirty," I said.Someone laughed from behind him. Jean-Luc moved out of the way, and I saw a seventy-year-old I'd swiped in a few times."About time we got a receptionist with some life in her," he said. "One of you boys better scoop her up." "I'm trying, Howard. I'm trying," Jean-Luc said. "So far I've been subtle, but I'm going to have to turn up the charm." Better work fast, sonny, before I grab her for myself."All three men smiled at me."These two can't hold a candle to you, Howard," I said. "They'll never have your charm."I swiped Jean-Luc's card and then Howard's card. All three guys went in.About a minute later the Nasarat twins came in. They were two beautiful girls my age who looked like they could be models."Did Howard come in yet?" one of them asked me. Surely they didn't mean seventy-year-old Howard who I just swiped in, did they? They.
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