You mustn’t mistake that for love.’ ‘There, you see what I mean. The old Pete wouldn’t have thought twice. It would have been, ‘She’s grateful, now can I use that to get into her knickers?’ Come on, be honest. I’m telling the truth, aren’t I?’ ‘Well, if we’re being honest? You’re probably right. There was a time when I would have had your knickers off before you realised what was happening. But I suppose people change, I don’t think I’ve conned a shag out of a girl in ages.’ ‘And there’s only one girl you’re going to be shagging from now on, and that’s me. Don’t you realise, you’ve done what you set out to do at the Lido that day, and you’ve scored, Pete. But I’ll warn you now, I’m not going to let you get away once you’ve fucked me. You’ll be mine forever, whether you like it or not. Now you can take me home, and I can introduce my parents to my future husband. You don’t appear to be running away . Can I assume we have a deal?’ I was flabbergasted, I loved her. I had never even. Seems his wife Mabel was a dispatcher where he worked, and sometimes rode along if nothing was going on. One woman had lost her engagement ring, and she paid to have the whole tank filtered looking for it, only to find it behind a plant on her counter. Another guy followed them to the dump station, seems he thought he was about to be busted, and had dumped eighty thousand dollars worth of cocaine down the toilet. They actually found the cocaine, and he got a nice long jail term.The next afternoon they were there at one-thirty. We located the cover and pulled it. There was the filter plain as day. Gus had me man the hose as he pulled it. He started grinning about the time it was halfway up.His wife looked down and giggled."I've found your problem, Chad. Might want to toss these in the wastebasket from now on."I looked at what he was holding. My filter was blocked with condoms. Twenty-three, I found out later. Stupidly, I wondered how a bunch of condoms had managed to find their way.
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