Look at me ... I'm ME! I have Italian blood, Greek blood, a little Irish blood, and some Aborigine blood. What do you say to that?"The Englishman replied,"Awfully sporting of your mother, old chap!"This one is compliments of Misguided ChildA businessman was preparing to go on a long business trip, so he thought he'd buy his wife something to keep her occupied. He went to a sex shop and explained his situation. The man there said, ' Well, I don't know that I have anything that will keep her occupied for so many weeks, except ... the MagicPenis!'The husband said, 'The what'?The man repeated, 'The Magic Penis, ' and pulled out what seemed to be an ordinary dildo.The husband laughed, and said, 'It looks like a dildo!'The man then pointed to the door and said, ' Magic Penis, door!'The penis rose out of its box, darted over to the door and started pounding away at the keyhole. The whole door shook wildly with vibrations, so much so, that a crack began to form down the middle. Then the man. Sheremembered being fussed over constantly as a child and was relieved tobe out from under her thumb. Her Mother now had another target, someoneelse to truss up and tie up with a bow. When Peter first began work asMargaret, he found this costume embarrassingly conspicuous. Yet theimplicit proscription on discussing his past life meant that he wassaved the worst humiliations. His former identity had almost completelyslipped from public memory. He now dressed, lived, and worked asMargaret, and answering to the name was now entirely second nature.Dredging up his former identity now would require rooting through thedocuments related to the estate's previous ownership. He would ratherjust forget.Peter, now under the weight of his elaborate, delicate maid's uniform,returned to the drawing-room. He gave a smile to the children beforegreeting Annabelle and her Mother with a curtsey."There will be 6 of us for dinner tonight Margaret," Emily said fromher seat. "John and Elizabeth are coming.".
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