This wasn’t the place or time to rehash old wounds. ‘I’ve got to go,’ I said. Jodie looked at me and shook her head, but she didn’t stop me from leaving. I walked into my apartment twenty minutes later and went directly to my bedroom. I didn’t even bother turning on a light. I was exhausted and all I could think about was my bed. The only problem was that as soon as my head hit the pillow, Jodie face formed in my mind. I was still awake when the sun rose. * * * A few weeks later I found myself waiting in my car for Kyle. He ran into a supermarket to pick up some steaks for dinner. Just before he left he grinned and dropped an envelop in my lap. I opened it and slowly shook my head. I hated Valentine’s Day. I had for years. I couldn’t really explain why, but it always seemed like such a farce. I could deal with and even enjoy the Halloween and Christmas silliness, but Valentine’s Day was another thing altogether. Kyle on the other hand, loved the holiday. He and his ex-wife used to. I checked in and took my bag up to our room, and then went down to the lobby to wait for her. Sitting in a chair, watching all the strangers milling around, I suddenly felt at peace. At last, I was ahead of the game, not desperately trying to play catch-up. My academic workload was better than up-to-date, I wasn’t running late to meet Jessie, and I wasn’t having crazy thoughts about getting revenge on my parents for excluding me.I suspect that I grew up a little more in that twenty-odd minutes of quiet reflection while I waited for Jessie to arrive.You know what it’s like at the end of an important task at work? When the client has finally signed off the plans, or you’ve mailed the tender documents, or you’ve run the new sub-routine and nothing has crashed? You deserve a few minutes of quiet self-congratulation. Yeah, that kind of tranquility.Suddenly, all those sick ideas of retribution and pain that had been running through my mind in the last few weeks seemed juvenile and utterly.
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