Ain't nobody fucks with Ma. And a word of advice to you, Jimmy-boy, uh, I mean, James. Ma's gonna be watchin' you like a hawk. Pull your load, and she'll love you to death. She'll even write letters for you. But, screw off, and she'll violate your probation so fast your head will spin. Like I said, ain't nobody fucks with Ma. Now, we'd best get cookin'."With JZ's help, we half-filled three huge pots with water and started heating it. To me, they looked like the pots you see in old cartoons where the cannibals are boiling the explorers. I started to grasp the size of the task ahead of us, especially when Holly came over with a big wheelbarrow full of freshly peeled potatoes. "We serve vegetable soup for lunch," Yolanda said. "Start cuttin' up them potatoes and throw em' in. I'll dice up these carrots and celery," she said, pointing to the many five-gallon pails Holly was lugging our way. "And make the pieces pretty small. A lot of our patrons don't got many teeth." What else goes in. “You can stop that now!” She laughed then fired a second at his chest making him flinch. “You’ll have to make do with me when I get home!” Pretending to be frightened of his wife John cowered behind a tea-towel, “What about…you know?” He nodded his head at a bag lying next to some shoes in the hall. “Shit. I nearly forgot.” Amanda chuckled as she chased her youngest son, firing pellets over his head, “the plastic bag is for you too.” John nodded again at the plastic bag. As I stepped towards it I realised John was watching my every movement. Cheekily I bent straight over from the waist to pick it up. For the first time in my life I felt deliciously naughty when my skirt rode up my thighs flashing my stocking tops and bum cheeks at him. As I stood straight again I opened the bag. A riding crop! Of course – how could I be Miss Whiplash without a whip? I turned to see my best friend’s husband leering at me. With a look of admonishment I flicked the end so it clipped his crotch.
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