I had killed him!I was still laying there, sobbing, the door still open, when my mom came."Laws a'mercy, child, what's the matter?"I handed her the telegram and started crying again.She sat down and hugged me. "Kitty, I know. I know how it is for you." No, it's worse that that, ma. I killed him. I did, I killed him."She let me cry for a while, holding me and saying soothing words while patting my back."Kitty, child, go put some coffee on and I'll take care of Sara."A few minutes later, Sara — now two — was fed and playing on a quilt on the kitchen floor.I told my mom what I'd almost done at the tavern the night before, of how I felt I had killed my Billy."Kitty, what you done was wrong, I cain't say it weren't. But, child, you didn't kill Billy. The war killed him. I'm glad you came home when you did — thanks to God for that."We sat and drank coffee, Sara blissfully ignorant... and happy playing on the floor. I started trying to put my life back together... hating myself for my. ." Very gay -- and pretty intolerant about it, actually. He needs to live and let live," Eddie Ray finished. "So you're not doing anything, I bet..." No..." Hey, I could come over..." You could?" This was the best news Nicky had heard all week!"Sure! Your mom doesn't scare me." That'd be cool! I'll call her!" Nicky enthused."Sure, go ahead. Then she won't be surprised," Eddie Ray agreed."What if she, well, hits on you?" Would it upset you if I gave her a little?" Eddie Ray asked.Nicky frowned, thinking about it. "I guess not." She's in line behind you, Man," Eddie Ray noted. "I'm there for you -- I just won't freak if she gets excited." Okay." Mama?" Nicky?" Uh huh. Hey, can I bring somebody home after the game tonight?" Did you make up with that Vince, Dear?" Myra gushed. "I'm so glad! I'm sorry I embarrassed him!" No, Vince is still a little freaked," Nicky related sadly, "But Eddie Ray is a nice guy -- and not as touchy." Oh, okay. Really?" Yeah, he and Vince hang out sometimes, so.
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