I am her good friend. I still offered to walk her home but I didn’t realize just how drunk I was, nor did she, when she said something to me as we left the bar that night. “Alex, will you walk me home?” “Uhhhhhh take you back to your place? Me, walk you home?” I said. She smiled this smile which indicated to anyone else but me that she was a little on the inebriated side of things. We started walking. As we walked we walked from one side to the other. We could not seem to walk a straight line if we tried. We laughed at each other. We laughed with one another. We crisscrossed back and forth as we went back to her apartment at the complex she lived in. Somehow we got up to her apartment. Somehow we got to the right apartment too. We knew one thing. We knew we felt good and once we were inside, and I don’t know why I went upstairs with her, but once we got to the apartment building I don’t know why I went up with her to her apartment. We fell to the couch in her apartment. Damn, did. In just a month since I received my first ray gun from the Xenarians, I have spread my web across this nation and into Canada.“It’s time to surrender and accept that I am the only real alternative to chaos. I call for any and all forces still in resistance or opposition to my rule to yield at once and accept the inevitable. This continent is mine and I fully intend to leave my stamp on it. My conquest has just begun and I’m already invincible, so don’t resist me, don’t oppose me. It’s pointless and futile. I will have your allegiance, one way or the other!” I slammed my open palm down on the desk, an old Etruscan hand trick that sounded like a thunderclap.“Well, that’s that, then! Tell me, do ... you ... want into my panties? I mean ... do you want to fuck me now? Because if you’re Dictator ... well, there’s no one to overrule you, is there? I’d better be on your good side first, right? If my bosses don’t like me fucking my interviewee in this case, they can piss off ... or kiss my.
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