John rushed to Vera’s bedside and knelt on one knee taking her hand, his throat no longer seemed to work and he could utter no words, he leaned over to kiss her hand and she felt the tear drops on her skin. Marie walked up behind him, ‘Here she is master … born on June 21st … the summer solstice … a good omen for her …’ John took the tiny bundle from Marie’s arms and looked down on the cherub face of a porcelain doll face framed with tiny dark curls. As he unfolded the blanket around the baby to count fingers and toes, he noticed the birthmark on her right shoulder. He was in awe and turned to face his wife … ‘Thank you’ was all he could choke out. ‘John,’ Vera began, ‘I want to name her Summer Hope after today and after what Cherish said about her being a Hopeful … is that to your liking?’ ‘There is nothing I could deny you this day … but I think Summer Hope is perfect for this little angel. And now, darling, I’d like to show her off, everyone is waiting at the front veranda.’ As he. "I did and you think I'm going back on that? I'm not making it easy am I... Fuck... Look, I'm all over the place... I know that... I'm going to wear my plug all day. I'm not giving it to someone else if that's what you're worried about. I wouldn’t do that, honestly, I wouldn’t." You think you're confused," I said. "You ain't the only one."She pushed me down on the bed, kissed me and held me."I'm sorry, love. I'm not leaving you, I’m just driving you crazy. I want to work this out, but right now, well right now... I don't know where I am in so many ways... and I have to go to work."She rolled off me, got dressed and headed off to work. Five minutes later I got a text:-I really do love you with all my heart. Please don’t doubt that whatever you think I’m doing.I tried to work. The only way to get anything done was to focus one hundred percent. That was a good plan, up to a point, the problem was that I got through everything I'd planned a lot faster. By ten thirty I had blasted through.
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