I quickly made up an excuse and ended the conversation. I sat there stunned. I had no idea what to do. I thought about going over to Beth’s and confronting her, telling her how much I loved her and asking her to be with me. But the more I thought about it, I was sure that was so unfair to Beth. If she had indeed met someone else, what a terrible position I would put her in. No matter how much it hurt, I had to back off. I decided to take a shower and go to bed. I really did not feel well.I skipped the next two Sundays at the in-laws, keeping to myself. The last thing I needed to do was run into Beth. I tried to keep myself busy with work and errands, doing my best to stay preoccupied. Soon it was the weekend again and I headed home Friday evening. I drove passed Beth’s and saw her taking packages out of her car. She waved at me and motioned for me to stop. I pulled to the curb and lowered the window. She came over with a smile and leaned in the passenger window.“Hey, Jeff, how are. Realizing that it would take him some few days, weeks even, to close down his life and arrange travel to the Nespelem area, the man decided he needed to ask for a favor.“Hey Doc,” he said as he entered Sick Bay, “How’s it going?”“Aww, crap! John, you never come to see me just to be social, you ALWAYS have something you just need me to do,” he said. The smile on his lips belying the harshness of his words.“I need enough supplies to support an NCE op, maybe for 30 – 40 kids and a few adults. Maybe a Corpsman or two?” His attempt at a boyish grin was not working too well that day.“So, Mel, we have been meeting twice a week for almost a year now and I don’t really think we are making any progress. You say the nightmares are still happening and your anxiety is still through the roof. I have stayed away from medications as I don’t think you want to walk around like a zombie.”I sighed, “Doctor Urban, please, you need to help me. I don’t sleep. I don’t eat. I can’t hold a job. Every day, all.
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