Having our mothers with us was a bigger help than any of us realized or would admit. Though technically women outside, we were still little girls who needed a parent as an emotional anchor.Endless speculation circulated amongst us, as to what was happening to our mothers.Darcy tried to end it, by saying, “It is no use to worry about things we have no control over.”But worry we did. Whoever the traitor was, she had taken our last piece of normalcy from us. When we found out who that woman was, she would pay.Eventually, we all sat down against the walls. This time Bianca and Darcy sat across from me. Conversation died, as each one of us dwelled on their own private thoughts.B sat with her feet together and her knees against her chest. She seemed to be sad or preoccupied.“Are you okay?” I asked her.“I’m fine,” she said, though I am not sure I believed her.Finally, about a half hour later, she spoke up in a small tentative voice, “Do you think that my ... body is ... ugly?”That shocked. Phoebe was falling into a bottomless red haze now, enveloped by the heat of the moment when their lips touched. Somewhere in that haze, Phoebe imagined there was another person, very much like herself but also entirely different, who was trying to find her…Phoebe broke off and backed away. For a second Abbie looked furious. Then her features relaxed into something like indifference. “Be that way, then,” she said. As suddenly as that, she was gone. Phoebe was alone in the clearing. Or at least, she seemed to be alone. Although she couldn’t see anyone, she had a feeling like there were dozens of pairs of eyes on her. Turning, she ran back to her house and locked the door. The sound of the horn didn’t stop for the entire night.*When she woke the next morning, Phoebe’s first thought was that it had all been real. She expected to roll over and see the burnt out candle on her nightstand and find that her shoes were still covered in mud and grass stains after walking in the pasture all.
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