"This is a thought piece from Earl...WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?Kindergarten Teacher: To get to the other side.Victorian Police: Give us five minutes with the chicken and we'll find out.Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.Plato: For the greater good.Aristotle: It is the nature of all chickens to cross roads.Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.Timothy Leary: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let him take.Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping50 tons of nerve gas on it.Ronald Reagan: I forgotCaptain James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.Hippocrates: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.Louis Farrakhan: The. Jayden!!! Oh God, you look like death!"I opened my blurry eyes, unsure of why I was gazing in to the depths of some bountiful cleavage. Was... was I on the floor? Had I feinted? What was that noise? As I became more and more aware of my surrounding I realised I was, in fact, on the ground, I must have feinted, my head felt like it was on fire... and those glorious orbs of bountiful breast belonged to my mother."Urgh... " groggily I went to sit up. How hard had I collapsed?! My head was pounding."Jayden, sweetie, we have to get you to the hospital!" I knew that was my mother but I didn't know why she sounded so alarmed.For the brief moment I tore my gaze from my mother's huge udders, I saw my sister, tears falling heavily from her eyes. Even in my confused state that was a sobering sight. I couldn't remember how it was that I had come to feint but I felt hungry... so freakin' hungry!It was all a blur as, who I assume were, paramedics came and went. Truth be told I was a little.
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