I couldn't get emotionally involved with anyone under those circumstances, as it would only hurt us both. Once my 'fix' had an emotional component -- and really didn't involve hurting anyone -- I could open up; in fact, I had to in order to be effective. I was sad for some of these guys -- and helping them and giving them a little comfort helped ME, so it wasn't something I had to be ashamed of. I could atone for my sins AND get my 'fix'; it was the best of both worlds.Monday night was good, and Tuesday night was better; Sis came by Tuesday afternoon, bubbling over, and told me that Gonzalo had taken her as a concubine -- and I was actually happy for her! It didn't really help me, but the idea that I was going to take a while to sort things out had been sort of out there all along. Last night had been good; I saw a guy I'd seen before. Apparently, my reputation was improving, since I was getting repeat customers. At this point, I don't know what I would do if I had a hundred guys. ...................I sat in my dorm, staring at the blank computer screen wearing a pair of jeans and a clean white t- shirt. Today was a Friday night and I had nothing to do. All my buddies were busy with their girls, and there I am, left with no one. Yeah, a billion girls asked me out this year but the only girl I was into was Delaney. A 19 year old, sexy teenage girl, who had long silky brown hair, a fine curved ass, and the most perfect golden skin. She was perfect, but we never got into the contact stage.Thinking of her started to turn me on, so I looked around my room, made sure the blinds were closed, the door was shut and I undid my zipper. I pulled out my 6"9 cock that was throbbing and warm and I softly started to stroke it. "Fuck..." I mumbled and leaned my head back. My other hand started to trail to the mouse of my Mac computer and I clicked onto the Internet. Soon enough I was watching porn. I watched a fine looking girl who looked around 18 or 19 fuck the crap out of.
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