But soon, his determined chants of gratefulness in his mind began to mix with something else. It was quiet at first. Something wrong with his hearing perhaps? Then it became more insistent, clearer. Names he’d never heard, dates that hadn’t yet come to pass, and places he never knew existed.It was a constant, never-ending stream. A barrage of noise and information overload that he was sure would drive him mad, if he wasn’t already. This was not a good moment in the life of John William Charles Hurst.He was sent to a special home for returning soldiers, that weren’t quite ready to return just yet - or ever, he feared.Then left alone in a room at his own request, something miraculous happened. Control.He didn’t question how or why, but somehow, someway, he’d gained control of the noise in his mind. It was still there - always there - but now he could process, compartmentalize, and have conversations with others without wanting to smash his head on the nearest hard surface.He was. That I slipped away from a duty to be courageous..." Exactly! My grandfather intentionally started an argument with paramilitary murderers in order to give me an opportunity to slip away. He was shot to death minutes later. I felt the exact same guilt... The dream I just had was a sharp memory from that time, two days after he was murdered. I was alone, and frightened to death, and my mind was filled with despair and loss, and my heart was full of hate."David was just silent for a moment, absorbing what Laura had said. "Laura, these must be extremely painful memories. I don't want to drag them out of you. Won't that increase the pain?" I don't know. But you are right, the rewards for indiscretion and reaching out to people can be fabulous. You are offering me both friendship and affection, and I want to accept the offers. I want to return some of the trust you're giving me..." Laura reached up and held the hand that was petting her head, moving it to her lips and kissing it..
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