We started email back and forth and it was pretty clear that heunderstood my situation and the baggage from my religiousbackground and quickly put me at ease. He looked really hot in thepicture he sent me. His named was Chris. He was nearly 15 yearsolder than me! We agreed to meet at a restaurant near my dorm room. During the meal, I learned he had booked a hotel room nearby aswell. We talked for more than 2 hours over some great Italianfood. He was really patient, very charming, and cool. He wasdivorced and bisexual. I was nervous as hell and he kept makingsmall jokes and relaxing me. At the end of the great dinner heasked what I wanted to do next and I quietly told him I wanted totake the next step. Looking back, I realize he was an expert atseducing me, which I loved.We went to this really nice hotel and he had an awesome suite thatwas out of the way from all the other guests. I sat down on thecouch and he sat next to me. I had never kissed anyone before andwas amazed. Conventional waters.Well, your old high school wasn't interested in you for a "Summer Principal", The UN already has a Swedish Ambassador (who is actually from Sweden) and NASA politely offered that even if the note signed by "The President" attesting to your one thousand hours of pilot-in-command time in jet aircraft was authentic, they were not currently hiring astronauts for a mission to Deep Space Nine and also Deep Space Nine doesn't exist. Which is why when you received a letter telling you you were exactly what they were looking for, and would you please come down to Such and Such address for orientation? it was something of a shock.It's with a mixture of helpless curiosity and growing apprehension that you look down at the fat stack of documents on the table in front of you, "PRINCELY ORIENTATION" helpfully typed out on its cover. You were already at the address before you actually remembered which gag application this had been for. And frankly, even then you only sort of.
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