Arab entertainment is all shit, obviously. Endless soap operas, dressed up as historical drama, and the odd comedy show which is usually as funny as gangrene in a toddler. You can’t be funny if your audience consists of pious people watching with the whole family. They do like their soaps, though, because muslims are very, very, very, very, very, very fond of pointing fingers and going: ‘Ooooh look at her! She’s no better than she ought to be!’ Only in Arabic, obviously. But I digress.Gunther was clearly very busy, so he pointed us to a lounge and left us to our own devices. I find myself struggling to describe the interior of the ship, but I’m sure you can imagine the way these things are styled: anything that’s made of metal will be gold, or at least gold plated. If it has a vertical surface area of more than a few square centimetres, it will be covered in panelled wood. All doors are made from glass, either clear or frosted, and none of them can work like regular doors: they must. I was just sitting here smoking and when you got up, you looked fantastic. I was like ‘Damn - that girl’s sexy!’ And it just made me laugh because I couldn’t believe I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I was completely turned on. Your body just looks amazing.” “Really? Well thanks, I do what I can,” she pretended to brag. “No, really though, that’s seriously flattering. A sexy ass girl telling me she was fantasizing about me… that’s hot.” “Yeah… I’m so not sexy though! Cute, maybe, but sexy? Most definitely not.” I was convinced I was right. She was the tall, dark, sultry one. Curves galore and a sexy body. I’m slim and tiny at just 5’1”. My red hair complements my pale skin, and I have a small but toned body. “Petite” is the perfect word to describe me. “Hell yeah, you’re sexy! A hot little piece… you’re gorgeous! Honestly, I’m surprised you’ve never thought about us before. I mean, two hot chicks always hanging out, besties through everything... I’ve definitely thought about what.
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